The Demented Yuyu Hakusho Talk Show
by KaibasAngel
Summary: Major OOC for Hiei some of the time...a few OC appear in this one...they pop up everywhere in my stories...R+R, feel free to flame, it's my first humor fic. The OC's are Kim, Kanna, Kaite, and Starr.
1. Episode 1: THE PREMIERE

Disclaimer: I do not, under any circumstance, own Yuyu Hakusho. Unfortunately. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*~*~*~*~ THE DEMENTED YUYU HAKUSHO TALK SHOW!!!  
  
Hosted By: Yusuke Urameshi!  
  
With: Star Minamino, Kim Michaels, Kanna Konimoto, Hiei, Keiko Yukimura, Botan, Kurama, and Kaite!  
  
Special Guests: The Yu-Gi-Oh Cast, The Cowboy Bebop Cast, Kero, Starr (she can be a guest, too!), Daria, and an appearance by Yuki Miyazaki!  
  
Yusuke-*walks out and sits in the host chair* Hey guys! Welcome to the first episode of The Demented Yuyu Hakusho Talk Show! I'll call everyone out, so you'll get familiar with him or her. First out, Kaite!!  
  
Kaite-*comes bounding out in a t-shirt and jeans, high- fiving Yusuke as he runs to his seat* Hey!  
  
Yusuke- Kurama!  
  
Kurama-*walks out and sits down, greeting Kaite as he sits*  
  
Yusuke: Kanna Konimoto!  
  
Kanna-*comes out in a white karate uniform, high-fiving Yusuke and Kaite, and greeting Kurama, blushing*  
  
Yusuke- Kim Michaels! (Oh god, she's dressed like a slut again.-_-;)  
  
Kim-*bounds out in a short black dress with a studded belt and stilettos*  
  
Yusuke-Hiei!  
  
Hiei-*simply walks out, greeting no one, and sits down*  
  
Yusuke- Starr Minamino!!! (Wait, we got her here?)  
  
Starr-*walks out with a white halter top and flares on, a white flower in her hair, greets the others, and sits down* Hi guys.  
  
Yusuke- Keiko Yukimura! (Oh no.)  
  
Keiko-*walks out and sits down*  
  
Yusuke- And Botan!!  
  
Botan-*bounds onstage in a very sporty looking outfit* Hi guys!  
  
~*Crickets chirp*~  
  
Botan- Very funny.  
  
Yusuke- we have a really well done debut show today. But first, let's have Starr and Kaite explain their.um.attendance.  
  
Kaite-I came because Starr's cousin put me up to it.I don't know about her.*points in Starr's direction*  
  
Starr- I'm here because I had nothing to do on Saturdays.so I thought it was a good idea.I just hope I escape with my sanity.  
  
Kaite- can we torture her to the point of insanity?  
  
All girls- NO!  
  
Yusuke- Let's bring out the first guest.Kero!  
  
Kero-*flies out and sits on Yusuke's head*  
  
Yusuke- You're Kero?  
  
Kero- Yup!!  
  
Yusuke- YOU DIDN'T TELL ME KERO WAS A LITTLE FLYING RAT!  
  
Kero- I highly resent that!  
  
Yusuke- Oh, go sit on Starr's head!  
  
Kero-*flies over and sits on her shoulder instead* I'm not that cruel.  
  
Starr- Oh, it's cute!!  
  
Hiei- I can't believe this.  
  
Keiko- I'm gonna go hang out backstage if you don't mind.I don't like little flying rodents.  
  
Botan- I think it's simply adorable!!  
  
Yusuke- you think everything's simply adorable.-_-;  
  
Botan- Not everything.  
  
Yusuke- Yeah, there's a few things.okay well never mind then.  
  
Kuwabara-*busts through the door* HEY! I FOUND IT!! Oh, Botan, I didn't know you'd be here.  
  
Hiei-*leans towards Botan* I'll pay you to put me out of my misery.  
  
Botan-As long as you kill me first.  
  
Kim- Kuwabara, I'll pay you to go the hell away!!!  
  
Kuwabara- what does that mean?  
  
All-*facevault*  
  
Kanna-If you take the city bus to the last stop, my cousin will be waiting on you!  
  
Kuwabara- Cool!*dashes out the door*  
  
Starr- why did you tell him that lie, Kanna?  
  
Kanna- I wasn't lying.  
  
Starr-*blinks* Oh my.  
  
Yusuke- Anyway.Kero, what's it like to be trapped in a book?  
  
Kero- Dull and boring. I want cake.  
  
Yusuke- Well, that's enlightening.how many clow cards are there?  
  
Kero- Fifty-two. CAN I GET A SNACK NOW!?  
  
Yusuke- all right, all right.Hiei, escort Kero to the snack bar.  
  
Hiei-NO.  
  
Yusuke-*Holds up the 'blackmail on Hiei' folder*  
  
Hiei-You suck.*walks off with Kero not far behind*  
  
Yusuke- Anyway.next guest.Starr?!  
  
Starr- ME?!*not exactly loud, she's soft-spoken*  
  
Botan- It was my idea.she's shy so I figured, why not?  
  
Kaite-She forced me.I can't say no to such a pretty face.  
  
Botan-*hugs Kaite* Awww!  
  
Yusuke- Well, why not.Starr get up here.  
  
Starr-*rises timidly and walks up, sitting and crossing her legs*  
  
Yusuke-So, you're a kitsune?  
  
Starr-Yes.  
  
Yusuke- What exactly is a kitsune?  
  
Starr-A fox spirit.  
  
Yusuke- Oh.Okay I have been dying to ask you this.Are you in love with Hiei?  
  
Starr- WHAT!?  
  
Botan- YUSUKE!  
  
Kaite-You know, you won't get it outta her, she'll run away.  
  
Yusuke-I'll fix that.*presses a button and Starr is locked down by metal bars*  
  
Starr-HEY!!!  
  
Yusuke- You love him!  
  
Starr- I DON'T!  
  
Yusuke- YOU DO!!  
  
Starr-I DON'T!!!  
  
Yusuke-YOU DON'T!!  
  
Starr- I DO!!! I mean.Wait.Oh; well you can't prove I said it!!!  
  
Yusuke-*plays it back on a recorder and sets Starr free*  
  
Starr-*sits back down*  
  
Botan-You okay?  
  
Starr-Yes.At least I think so.  
  
Botan-*moves over one chair to sit next to Starr*  
  
Hiei-*walks in* did I miss anything?  
  
Kaite and Yusuke- Starr loves you!!  
  
Hiei-*blinks* Is that all?  
  
Kim and Kanna- Next guest: DARIA!!!  
  
Daria-*Walks out and sits in the guest chair*  
  
Kaite- Daria? It was supposed to be Starr's diary.oh well.YAY DARIA!  
  
Starr-How mean!  
  
Kaite- you'll live.  
  
Yusuke- Daria, do you really like Trent?  
  
Daria-To be politically correct, I take my affections and all other feelings for Trent very seriously and feel that that was an incoherently obvious answer.  
  
Yusuke- Uh, what?  
  
Daria-Yes.  
  
Yusuke-Are you really dark and demented?  
  
Daria-There's something out there.something.stupid.  
  
Kuwabara-*busting in the door* I won't be here for the rest of the shows so best of luck!!!  
  
Kero-*popping up* There's no snacks left.  
  
Kanna-Stick around.there's karaoke.  
  
Daria- I'll hang backstage for a while.  
  
All but Hiei-Bye Daria.  
  
Yusuke-Since the Yu-Gi-Oh Cast hasn't arrived, on to Cowboy Be-*is cut off by Yuki bounding in, and slipping on the floor*  
  
Yusuke-What was that?  
  
Hiei-Look down you idiot.  
  
Yusuke-Yuki.YUKI?!*points his spirit gun at her*  
  
Kim and Kanna-SHE ISN'T EVIL ANYMORE!!!  
  
Yusuke-*scratches his head and shocks himself* I guess I just haven't seen you in a while.*helps her up*  
  
Yuki-Uh huh.the Yu-Gi-Oh cast just got here.  
  
Yusuke- Send 'em in.  
  
Yuki- Okay.HEY GUYS!! COME ON IN!  
  
~*The whole cast of Yu-Gi-Oh comes in and sits down*~  
  
Yusuke- I just want to ask two questions for all of you.first of all.where did all this confusion about the Millennium items start?  
  
Yami-I can answer that.the game Duel Monsters comes from the original game created by Millennia, one of the Egyptian princesses at the time.her father had an extremely short temper.and didn't like the idea of Millennia's card game. So he created the millennium items. He took the souls of Millennia, myself, and many other great duelists at that time, and sealed them away inside the Millennium items.  
  
Yusuke-Okay.what's it like dueling in those big holographic stadiums?  
  
Tea-It's pretty neat.the monsters grow so large, and they look so real.  
  
Yugi-It's alright, to me it's no different than the card game on a table.  
  
Joey- It's a wake up call, I'll tell ya that! Ya get hit with another monster's attack and the next thing ya know you're almost bein' blown off the stadium!  
  
Mai- It's nothing special.  
  
Kaiba- No comment.  
  
Mokuba-It's cool.  
  
Yuki-*walks onstage, tossing Kaite a bottle of saki.* Here.  
  
Kaite-Yes!!  
  
Yuki-*sits down next to Botan*  
  
Kaite-*singing while drinking saki* You remind me of a girl.that I.once knew.  
  
Hiei-*leaning over to Starr* I pity you.  
  
Kim, Kanna, and Starr-*heads in hands*Oh no.  
  
Yusuke- Uh.now, let's bring out.uh...Cowboy.Bebop.  
  
Faye-*walking out* Oh look, the one singing's cute!  
  
Spike and Jet-You don't discriminate, do you? -_-;  
  
Yusuke- Spike, what's it like dealing with Faye all day?  
  
Spike- it's a living hell.  
  
Yusuke- kinda like me dealing with Kuwabara.Jet, what's it like to be a bounty hunter?  
  
Jet- it's okay.I can get away with murder, but the worst part is the bounties.they're shit. You can't get any expenses form the chase covered and have anything left for you.  
  
Yusuke- Well, Faye's a little.um.preoccupied at the moment.so let's break for a little open chat.  
  
~*All the girls but Kim, Kanna, Ed, and Starr are fawning over Kaite. Ed and Ein are laying in the corner, asleep, Hiei, Starr, Kim, Kanna, and Kurama are chatting amongst themselves.*~  
  
Kanna-*walks over to Kurama* Can I talk to you alone?  
  
Kurama-Why not?*walks off with Kanna*  
  
Kanna-You're awful quiet.  
  
Kurama-I just don't feel like talking.*is cut off by Kanna kissing him*  
  
Kanna-I.I.I love you, Kurama.  
  
Kurama- I figured that.*kisses her*  
  
Kim: I'm gonna go back stage for a while.I need an aspirin.  
  
Starr-Poor Kim.her eardrums must be on the verge of bleeding.  
  
Hiei-So are mine.um, Starr.  
  
Starr-*looks at him* what?  
  
Hiei-Yusuke told me about your little.um.confession.  
  
Starr-Great.  
  
Yusuke- Well, he had a right to know!!  
  
Hiei and Starr-HUSH!!  
  
Hiei-Why?  
  
Starr-Why what?  
  
Hiei-Do you love me?  
  
Starr-I don't think that I know.I just do.  
  
Hiei-That's not exactly the answer I thought I'd get.but it's pretty close.  
  
Starr-*laughs softly* so now you're trying to be a psychic?  
  
Hiei-No.but I have been thinking about doing this.*kisses her*  
  
Yusuke- NOW EVERYONE IN HERE IS KISSING!!!!! (Almost.) I HAVE A THING AND A DOG SLEEPING IN THE CORNER, KURAMA AND KANNA KISSING.Oh.My.God.HIEI AND STARR?!*The both of them stop kissing and immediately start to blush* I hate to do this but.KARAOKE HOUR!!!!  
  
Faye-*Snaps out of her trance* Oh, I had something planned for the girls.come on girls!!!*as she walks out, she goes back and grabs Starr by the wrist, dragging her backstage*  
  
Starr- something tells me I'm not gonna like this.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~ *~*~Backstage~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Starr- I knew I wasn't gonna like this.  
  
~* Mai and Faye have fixed up all the girls. They were all dressed in blue jeans and a red crop top, with stilettos, courtesy of Faye. Mai did their makeup & hair.body glitter, red eye shadow, the works.*~  
  
Yuki-*is dressed up the way Faye and Mai had done her up, whispering to Yusuke* There's gonna be an embarrassing side show of "Jumpin' Jumpin'" on the main stage.mind announcing it?  
  
Yusuke-Fine, when?  
  
Faye-In a few minutes.  
  
Starr-This shirt is way too short!  
  
Mai-It's supposed to show the belly button, dear, now hold still..*Pierces Starr's belly button*  
  
Starr-*yelps* MAI!!!  
  
Mai- oh, It's not that bad.  
  
Yusuke- And now, Starr, Mai, Botan, Faye, Tea, Keiko, (what the hell? Starr is bad enough, but KEIKO?!) Kim, Kanna, and Yuki, performing Jumpin' Jumpin'!!!! (God help us all.)  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~On Stage~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
~*The girls whispering*~  
  
Starr- I don't wanna do this.  
  
Botan-Get over it. If I can do it, so can you!  
  
Mai- Look at it this way: The boys are watching. If you do well, they'll probably be amazed, and probably confused, but still happy they've got a talented girlfriend.if ya blow it, it gives ya something to laugh about together!  
  
Kanna- Big help, Mai.  
  
Faye-I hope Kaite's watching.  
  
Kim, Kanna, Yuki, and Starr- O.o;  
  
~*Music starts playing*~  
  
Mai, Faye, Botan, Keiko, Yuki, Kanna, Kim, Tea, and Starr:  
  
Ladies leave your man at home, the club is full of ballers and their pockets full grown.  
  
And all you fellas leave your girl with her friends, cuz eleven thirty and the club is Jumpin' Jumpin'!  
  
Boy say he got a girl, yeah it's true you got a man, but the party ain't gon' stop, so let's make it hot (hot)!  
  
Last weekend you stayed at home alone and lonely.Couldn't find your man, he was chillin' with his homies  
  
This weekend you goin' out, if he try to stop you you're goin' off. You gotcha hair done, and your nails done too,  
  
A new outfit and in ya shoes, ya need ta cupalei at the hottest spot tonight  
  
You gonna find the girls rollin' in the Lexes trucks and Hummers.  
  
~*The girls finish with their song and take their seats, leaving an extremely stunned crowd of boys*~  
  
Kaiba-Who knew?  
  
Kaite-*dropping his saki bottle but quickly recovering it* Holy crap!!!!  
  
Yusuke-Uh, that was.unexpected.*looks at Starr*  
  
Starr-You didn't know I could do that, did you?  
  
Kurama and Hiei-*shaking their heads* But you didn't either, did you?  
  
Starr-I knew I could sing, just not go as far as to pierce my belly button, let alone wear a crop top!  
  
Yusuke- And next we have.oh no.Kaiba and his.Blue Eyes?  
  
Kaiba-Oh great.  
  
Kanna-You'll be singing "Brain Stew".  
  
Kaiba-NO.  
  
Kim-*hands Yusuke the "Blackmail on Kaiba" folder*  
  
Kaiba-Kim, why did you do that?  
  
Kim-So you'd be forced to embarrass yourself.  
  
Kaiba- Omae o Korosue (Translation: I'll kill you.)  
  
Kim-I love you too, Seto!  
  
Kaiba-Do you have any idea at all what I just said, Kim?  
  
Kim- Yes, you said you'd kill me.  
  
Kaiba-She's a complete moron.-_-;  
  
Kim-*pushes Kaiba up onto the stage and stuffs a microphone into his hand. She then releases the Dragon*  
  
Kaiba:  
  
~*Dragon roars, causing Starr to flinch and grab Hiei's arm*~  
  
I'm having trouble tryin' to sleep. I'm counting sheep but running down.  
  
AS time ticks by still I try, no rest for cobshocks in my mind. I'm on my own, here we go.  
  
~*dragon still continues to roar, and Kaiba finishes his turn, looking humiliated*~  
  
Kurama-That wasn't so bad, was it?  
  
Kaiba-You don't know the half of it.  
  
Keiko-He will. He's next.  
  
Kurama-0.o; Alright, what do I have to sing?  
  
Botan-Desert Rose.  
  
Hiei-Great.  
  
Starr-*cracking up*  
  
Kurama-*grabs Starr by the wrist* if you think it's so funny, you're going to do it with me, Starr.  
  
Starr- Great. -_-;  
  
Yusuke- This is gonna be good.  
  
Kurama and (a very reluctant) Starr:  
  
I dream of rain, e-lay, e-lay  
  
I dream of gardens in the desert sand, e-lay, e-lay  
  
I wake in pain, e-lay, e-lay  
  
I dream of love as time runs through my hand.  
  
~*Kurama and Starr finish their song and take their seats.*~  
  
Starr-That is the LAST time I laugh at someone who is about to do karaoke.  
  
Hiei-*busts out laughing* The look on your face when he told you.it was priceless!!!  
  
Starr-Yeah, well let's see you do better, hot-shot!  
  
Kanna-Keiko, you're up.Just A Girl.  
  
Keiko-Thank goodness, something I know!  
  
All but Keiko- O.o;  
  
Keiko-  
  
  
  
Take this pink ribbon off my eyes. I'm exposed, and it's no big surprise.  
  
  
  
Don't you think I know exactly where I stand? This world is forcing me to hold your hand!  
  
'Cuz I'm just a girl, oh little old me, well, don't let me out of your sight.Oh I'm just a girl, all pretty and petite.  
  
So don't let me have any rights!!! Oh, I've had it up to.here.  
  
~*Keiko finishes her song to applause*~  
  
Kaiba-Once again, who knew?  
  
Mokuba-Were we supposed to answer the first time?  
  
Kaiba- Mokuba.-_-;.Get backstage.  
  
Mokuba-Gotcha.*walks off* 0.o;  
  
Kanna- Hiei, you're up.oh no.  
  
Starr-What is it?  
  
Kanna-Bon Jovi.  
  
Starr-*facevaults* Great.  
  
Hiei-I am NOT doing this by myself.  
  
Starr- Don't EVEN!!!  
  
Hiei-Rats...I thought I could torture you again.c'mon Kaite.  
  
Kim, Kanna, Yuki, and Starr- CAN WE HAVE EARPLUGS!?  
  
Yusuke- No, you have to sit through the torture just like I do.  
  
Kaite and Hiei:  
  
This ain't a song for the broken hearted! A silent prayer for the faith departed.  
  
I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd, you're gonna hear my voice when I shout out loud.  
  
It's my life.It's now or never! I ain't gonna live forever.I just wanna live while I'm alive  
  
(It's my life) My heart is like an open highway.I ricoched [HOW do you spell that???] and did it my way.  
  
I just wanna live while I'm alive.It's.My.Life!!!  
  
~*Hiei and Kaite finish their song, returning to their seats, being fawned over by the girls*~  
  
Yusuke-*Blinks* Um.Okay.  
  
Kaite-Saki anyone?  
  
Starr-Why not? I've done everything else today.*takes a few swigs of saki and is almost instantly drunk*  
  
Spike-Oh boy.has she ever had a drink in her life Kaite?  
  
Kaite-No. But it is stronger than traditional saki, so.  
  
Spike-Pass it here, Kaite!!  
  
Starr-I had a great idea just now.Mai, could you help me?  
  
Mai-Sure!  
  
~*The two girls go backstage*~  
  
Spike-I wonder what they're up to.  
  
Kurama-There's no telling.  
  
Tristan-Especially with Mai around.  
  
Yusuke-So the pointy haired freak finally speaks!  
  
Tristan-WATCH IT!!  
  
Yusuke-^_^  
  
~*Mai runs onstage and clears her throat*~  
  
Mai-PRESENTING THE ACT OF THE CENTURY!! MISS STARR MINAMINO PERFORMING "WORK IT OUT!"  
  
All but Mai-WHAT THE HELL!? 0_o;  
  
~*the curtains open to reveal Starr, dressed in an extremely short gold dress with slits up the sides to just before her hips, gold heels, and gold cat earrings. She had on glittery gold makeup, and her hair was down, reaching almost to her waist*~  
  
Hiei-Who is that again?  
  
Yusuke-Starr  
  
Kurama-Shy, quiet Starr? No way!  
  
Kim and Kanna- It IS Starr!  
  
Botan-Mai did a really good job on this one.  
  
Starr-  
  
How you doing honey baby? You know I don't ask for much but, For a girl spending time alone can be pretty rough.  
  
but, I get a knock on my door.I know its yours for sure  
  
can't wait for the bedroom, so just hit the floor  
  
Is ya'll alright? I don't know but I know what's happened to me girl.  
  
Is ya'll alright? .break it down now!  
  
  
  
~*Starr finishes acting crazy and snaps out of her saki-powered daze*~  
  
  
  
Starr-Huh? Ack! WHY AM I DRESSED LIKE THIS!?  
  
Yusuke-That's what we'd like to know..  
  
Starr-*sits down* I could die on the spot.  
  
Botan-For someone on saki, you were pretty good!  
  
Yusuke-That's it for the show this week, see ya next time!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*Backstage after the show*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
~*The girls are all pressed up against the door, and Kaite and Spike are training.shirtless*~  
  
Starr-Spike's kinda cute.  
  
Botan-So is Kaite.  
  
Starr-Don't be demented, he's my brother.  
  
~*The door collapses, causing all the girls to fall into the room*~  
  
Kaite-Uh.Starr?  
  
Starr-Don't you say a WORD!*takes off running*  
  
~*All the other girls are either knocked out or sitting against the wall*~  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Well, that's my first Humor fic! R+R and feel free to flame! 


	2. Episode 2: Hiei Speaks Ham-Ham?

Disclaimer: I do not, under any circumstance, own Yuyu Hakusho. Unfortunately.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Author's Note: Hiei goes EXTREMELY OOC in this episode.all in good fun guys, all in good fun!! Oh, and there's no Karaoke time today! And also, I will interview OC's and authors. Just tell me what fic they appear in, and I'll get readin'!  
  
THE DEMENTED YUYU HAKUSHO TALK SHOW!!!  
  
Hosted By: Yusuke Urameshi!  
  
With: Star Minamino, Kim Michaels, Kanna Konimoto, Hiei, Keiko Yukimura, Botan, Kurama, and Kaite!  
  
Special Guests: The Outlaw Star Cast, Hamtaro, And The Blitz Team  
  
Yusuke-*walks out and sits in the host chair* Hey guys! Welcome to the first episode of The Demented Yuyu Hakusho Talk Show! I'll call everyone out, so you'll get familiar with him or her. First out, Kaite!!  
  
Kaite-*comes bounding out in a t-shirt and jeans, high- fiving Yusuke as he runs to his seat* Hey!  
  
Yusuke- Kurama!  
  
Kurama-*walks out and sits down, greeting Kaite as he sits*  
  
Yusuke: Kanna Konimoto!  
  
Kanna-*comes out in a green wrap top and shorts with sandals on, high- fiving Yusuke and Kaite, and greeting Kurama, blushing*  
  
Yusuke- Kim Michaels! (Does this bitch ever give up? -_-;)  
  
Kim-*bounds out in a black halter top and short skirt with stilettos*  
  
Yusuke-Hiei!  
  
Hiei-*simply walks out, greeting no one, and sits down*  
  
Yusuke- Starr Minamino!!! (Will you look at this girl? She actually looks kinda hot.oops!!)  
  
Starr-*Walks out in a light blue crop top that says "Angel" in dark blue lettering, and denim daisy dukes, with sneakers. She also has in a blue belly button ring. * Hey Yusuke!  
  
Yusuke- Keiko Yukimura! (Not again.)  
  
Keiko-*walks out and sits down*  
  
Yusuke-Yuki Miyazaki!!  
  
Yuki-*runs out wearing a red crop top with gold lettering that says "Hottie" and flares*  
  
Yusuke- And Botan!!  
  
Botan-*bounds onstage in shorts and a green shirt and sneakers* Hi guys!  
  
~*Audience applauses this time*~  
  
Botan-They clapped this time!  
  
Yusuke-This is our second episode, and It's gonna be good. Starr, what happened?  
  
Starr-Mai happened.I actually kinda like it.  
  
Kanna-What do you mean, 'Mai happenned'?  
  
Starr-She took me shopping.this woman has at least a thousand credit cards.- _-;  
  
Kim-I like it!  
  
Kaite-You would.  
  
Hiei-I don't so much mind it, it just isn't normal.  
  
Keiko-I think it's cute!  
  
All but Keiko and Kim-YOU WOULD!!!  
  
Botan-Starr, have you ever thought of modeling?  
  
Starr-*blushes* No.  
  
Botan-Do you know how?  
  
Starr-Kinda.  
  
Yusuke-Then model for us!  
  
Starr-No!  
  
Yusuke-I hate to do this, but.*holds up the 'Blackmail on Starr' folder*  
  
Starr-I'm beginning to dislike you.*rises from her seat and walks up onto the platform*  
  
Yusuke-Hold on!*grabs a boom box and a camera*  
  
Starr-0.o;  
  
Yusuke-*presses play on the boom box and Sir Mix A Lot plays*  
  
Starr-You are a perv, aren't you?  
  
Yusuke-*changes the music to the remix of "I'm Gonna Be Alright" by J.Lo plays* Better?  
  
Starr-Yes.*starts modeling*  
  
~*Cameras click furiously as Starr finishes modeling*~  
  
Kurama-Is it me, or do we need a runway?  
  
Yusuke-Well, that was {cough} interesting.  
  
Yuki-You might wanna get to the first guests.  
  
Yusuke-Right.Please welcome, Gene, Jim, Aisha, Suzuka, and Melfina!!! And, guys, no saki!  
  
Starr-I'll end up with saki anyway.  
  
~*The OS Crew walks out, greeting Yusuke and the co hosts, Gene kissing all the girls on the cheek and loving it*~  
  
Yuki and Kim-Wow.*blushing*  
  
Kaite-Yuki is actually BLUSHING!!  
  
Kurama-And Kim, as well!  
  
Gene-One question.who was the girl modeling earlier?  
  
Yusuke-That would have been Starr.the one in the blue shirt.  
  
Gene-She's cute.  
  
Hiei-*clears his throat*  
  
Gene-Riiiiiight.whatever.  
  
Yusuke-What's it like to be an outlaw?  
  
Gene-Alright.I mean it's nothing to fuss over.  
  
Jim-I think it's a terror and a burden. This guy had to pop his space cherry just to become an outlaw!!  
  
Gene-SHUT UP!!!  
  
All girls except Keiko-*cracking up*  
  
Starr-Space.Cherry.*busts out laughing but tries really hard to stop*  
  
Melfina-I really don't qualify as an outlaw.I don't think.  
  
Aisha-I'm not an outlaw.I'm a proud Ctarl Ctarl!  
  
Suzuka-I'm an assassin, not an outlaw.  
  
Yusuke-Well, thanks for that enlightening introspective, guys. See ya later for Karaoke!  
  
Keiko-Next guest is.Hamtaro? You scheduled a Hamster?  
  
Starr- it's just so adorable!  
  
Hamtaro-*runs out and sits in Yuki's lap*  
  
Yuki-Beat it Ham-Ham!  
  
Hamtaro-*runs down Yuki's legs and starts to crawls up Hiei's body*  
  
Hiei-Don't even, hamster!*Grabs it from his shoulder and puts it on Starr's head*  
  
Starr-Hey!  
  
Hiei-You said it was adorable.  
  
Starr-That doesn't necessarily mean I want it on my head, babe.  
  
Yusuke-Here we go with the pet names.  
  
Hiei and Starr-SHUT UP!!  
  
Starr-Dimwit.  
  
Hiei-Idiot.  
  
Kanna-They are so much alike it's scary!  
  
Kurama-I know.  
  
Hamtaro-Kushi Kushi!  
  
Hiei-I know, it's true.  
  
All but Hiei-*facevault*  
  
Yusuke-*slowly getting up* you speak Ham-Ham?  
  
Hiei-I have for a while now.  
  
Yusuke-Oh..My..Lord..  
  
Hiei-Doesn't every demon speak Ham-Ham?  
  
All demons but Hiei-No!  
  
Hiei-Hn..  
  
Starr-*looks at Hiei darkly* Idiot Koorime..  
  
Hiei-*looks back* your fox ears are showing..stupid kitsune..  
  
Starr-*makes her silver fox ears visible to everyone, and her silver tail as well* Sometimes I hate you.  
  
Hiei-*kisses her on the forehead, causing her ears to twitch, and smiles* I noticed.  
  
Yusuke-Hiei, I'm counting on you to translate for me.  
  
Hiei-If I don't you're going to blackmail me into it. So why not?  
  
Yusuke-What's the world like to a hamster?  
  
Hamtaro-crum crum tikki tikki kush kush!  
  
Yusuke-Translation?  
  
Hiei-Very large and scary.  
  
Starr-*hugging Hiei* You will never cease to amaze me, will you?  
  
Hiei-probably not..  
  
Yusuke-Why is Brandy so freakin' lazy?  
  
Hamtaro-badda badda kushi kushi  
  
Hiei-All dogs are like that, aren't they?  
  
Kim-not the ones you have to hop fences REALLY fast to avoid!  
  
Yuki-She means a German Shepard. She's scared to death of them.  
  
Kanna-It's true. I have to lock Honey up so Kim can come over!  
  
Yusuke-Thanks Hamtaro. You can go now.  
  
Hamtaro-*walks out*  
  
Kaite-You named a HUGE GERMAN SHEPERD "HONEY"!? WHY!?  
  
Keiko-Why not?  
  
Hiei-They're complete morons..  
  
Kim-It took you that long to notice?  
  
Kuwabara-*bangs in through the backstage door* Hey!!  
  
Kanna-Oh no..  
  
Kurama-^_^; Not again..  
  
Starr-Don't worry, I've got it covered..SECURITY!!  
  
~*Doma the Angel of Silence and Celtic Guardian come out and haul off Kuwabara*~  
  
Keiko-Um..  
  
Kaite-Those were..  
  
Hiei-What the hell?  
  
Yusuke-Um, Starr?  
  
Starr-^_^; Gifts from Yami.  
  
Yuki-Oh my god..  
  
Kim-You're joking!  
  
Kanna-Ooh, Starr!!!  
  
Starr-You're pushing it, Kanna Konimoto!!!  
  
Hiei-Alright..that's enough, Starr.  
  
Kanna-Yusuke, bring out the next guest.  
  
Yusuke- Alright..The next guest is the Blitz Team!  
  
~*The Blitz Team walks onstage, greeting everyone, and looking at Starr's fox ears and tail with amazement*~  
  
Leena-Nice ears, where'd you buy them?  
  
Starr-I didn't buy them I was born with them.  
  
Bit-I like 'em..  
  
Doc-You like anything on any girl you see, Bit!  
  
Bit-True..  
  
Jamie-I think they make her look mysterious.  
  
Starr-STOP TALKING ABOUT MY EARS!!*Phases them out of sight again*  
  
Yusuke-That's probably a good idea. So, what exactly is a Zoid fighter's life like?  
  
Brad- it's dull at times. When there's nothing to do and no battles scheduled there's a lot of free time to fill. Which reminds me.*looks at Yuki* I'm free Saturday.  
  
Yuki-*blushes and looks away*  
  
Bit-It gets really exciting a lot of times. So much action that it's hard to lose interest.  
  
Lena-I'm happy battling if I have ammo!!!  
  
Doc-I don't battle.  
  
Jamie-It's hard. After you battle, even if there's nothing to do, you have to make sure your Zoid is maintained properly.  
  
Yusuke- I have a question just for Brad.  
  
Brad-Sure, shoot!  
  
Yusuke-Did you just ask Yuki out a minute ago?  
  
Brad-Well, yeah.  
  
Yusuke- Thought so. Thanks for coming guys!!  
  
Doc-It was our pleasure.  
  
~*As team leaves, Brad goes back and kisses Yuki, leaving his number with her.*~  
  
Yuki-*touching her lips* Well..  
  
Yusuke-That's all this week. See ya next time!  
  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 


	3. Episode 3: Beach Antics and Waterwars...

Disclaimer: I do not, under any circumstance, own Yuyu Hakusho. Unfortunately.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Author's Note: Hey, I goofed last time. I put the first again, instead of the second, sorry guys! I sent the gang to the beach, what with all the funny opportunities.(Diabolical laughing on cue now) MWAHAHAHAHA!!!{cough} Anyway, NO KUWABARA BASHING BY THE HOST OR CO-HOSTS!!! And also, remember that I will interview OC's and authors. Just tell me what fic they appear in, and I'll get readin', cuz I'm runnin' outta guests and FAST!  
  
THE DEMENTED YUYU HAKUSHO TALK SHOW!!!  
  
Hosted By: Yusuke Urameshi!  
  
With: Star Minamino, Kim Michaels, Kanna Konimoto, Hiei, Keiko Yukimura, Botan, Kurama, and Kaite!  
  
Special Guests: This is a vacation episode, okay people? NO GUESTS!!  
  
Yusuke-*walks out and sits in the host chair* Hey guys! Welcome to the third episode of The Demented Yuyu Hakusho Talk Show! I'll call everyone out, so you'll get familiar with him or her. First out, Kaite!! (And If anyone asks why the girls are in bathing suits, DO NOT ASK OR COMPLAIN!! IT TOOK TWO HOURS TO CONVINCE KEIKO AND STARR!!)  
  
Kaite-*comes bounding out in a pair of swim trunks and jeans, high- fiving Yusuke as he runs to his seat* Hey!  
  
Yusuke- Kurama!  
  
Kurama-*walks out and sits down, greeting Kaite as he sits*  
  
Yusuke: Kanna Konimoto!  
  
Kanna-*comes out in an orange two-piece sport swimsuit and orange sandals, doing cartwheels and back flips*  
  
Yusuke- Kim Michaels! (WHERE DOES THIS GIRL SHOP??)  
  
Kim-*runs out in a black bikini with a gold chain around the waist, black sandals and sunglasses *  
  
Yusuke-Hiei!  
  
Hiei-*simply walks out, greeting no one, and sits down*  
  
Yusuke- Starr Minamino!!! (After much effort, we got her in a one piece.what the hell? 0.o;)  
  
Starr-*Walks out in a white string bikini, a white headband, white sandals, and sunglasses. There is a silver locket around her neck (AN: Hint Hint!!)* What?  
  
Yusuke- Keiko Yukimura! (Oh boy.)  
  
Keiko-*walks out in a blue one piece and sits down*  
  
Yusuke-Yuki Miyazaki!!  
  
Yuki-*runs out wearing a blood red tankini and red sandals, high fiving Yusuke and Kaite as she goes by*  
  
Yusuke- And Botan!!  
  
Botan-*bounds onstage in a green two-piece sport swimsuit and sandals* Hi guys!  
  
~*No sound from the audience..there isn't one.*~  
  
Botan-Hehe, this is gonna be great!  
  
Yusuke-This is our third episode, and we're going to the beach! Um, Starr, what's with the fashion statement?  
  
Starr-Mai happened..again.  
  
Kaite-That woman is turning my cousin into god knows what.  
  
Yusuke-Don't complain!!  
  
Kim-I like it!  
  
Kaite-You would.  
  
Hiei-I don't so much mind it.  
  
Keiko-Can we go now?  
  
Yusuke-Yeah.Yuki did you bring your wrangler?  
  
Yuki-Yeah.Let's go!  
  
~*Everyone piles into the small black Jeep Wrangler and they head to the beach*~  
  
Starr-*Getting out of the car* Yusuke, you were on me almost the entire time!  
  
Yusuke-And?  
  
Starr-My legs are killin' me!  
  
~*Yuki goes over and sits on a beach towel, followed by Starr and Hiei, they aren't fond of water*~  
  
Yusuke-Those three are such chickens.  
  
Starr-*looking up* I just think water is too cold is all. I'm not saying anything else about it to you.  
  
Hiei-Hn....  
  
Yuki-I just don't want to get wet right now.  
  
Kurama-*looks at Kanna* Are you thinking what I'm thinking?  
  
Kanna-I think so....*looks from Starr to the water, and then into Kurama's eyes*  
  
Kurama-That's right.  
  
~*Kanna grabs Kim's wrist, telling her the plan. The three demons go over and Kurama picks Starr up, while the girls restrain her. They then drop her in the ocean and hold her under for a reasonable amount of time before letting her up*~  
  
Starr-*rising from the water* DAMNIT YOU!!!! THAT'S NOT FUNNY!!!!!!!  
  
Hiei-*ACTUALLY LAUGHING* Yes it is!  
  
Starr-You're not helping.  
  
Hiei-*walks up and holds her under again, only to get chased by Starr when she gets out*  
  
Starr-IDIOT KOORIME!!!!!  
  
Yusuke-Will those two ever stop running?  
  
Yuki-Not for a while.  
  
Yusuke-*looks at Yuki evilly*  
  
Yuki-What?  
  
Yusuke-*picks up Yuki, putting her over his shoulder*  
  
Yuki-*beating on his back with her fists* LET ME GO!! PUT ME DOWN!!!  
  
Yusuke-Okay....*drops her....in the water*  
  
Kuwabara-Quit trying to kill all the girls!!  
  
Kim-I think for once, we're not gonna bash you....by the way, how did you get....never mind.  
  
Kuwabara-Really?  
  
Kanna-*tossing him a water gun* Really. Look out!!  
  
~*Kuwabara is hit with multiple streams of water from water guns and is also hit by water balloon bombs*~  
  
Kuwabara-NOT FAIR!! SNEAK ATTACK!!!*Chases Kanna, Kim, Yusuke, Starr, Keiko, Botan, and Yuki with his water gun*  
  
Kim-*turns around to throw a water balloon bomb at Kuwabara but is hit in the face by a stream of water and a water balloon bomb* Who did that?  
  
Kaite-Kanna.I'm leaving guys, I don't want to stick around anymore.  
  
Botan-Huh? What do you mean?  
  
Kaite-I'm going home before I end up sunburned, like Yuki last summer  
  
Yuki- Kaite, you are INCORRIGABLE!  
  
Kaite-*Walking off, getting a taxi* I know. See you at home.  
  
Yuki-Alright....  
  
Kurama-We lost one.  
  
Starr-At least there won't be any more saki-powered confusion today.  
  
Hiei-*leaning against Starr* True.  
  
Starr-*Drops a water bomb on his head*  
  
  
  
~*Hiei and Starr go running off*~  
  
Keiko and Botan- Bye Kaite!!!  
  
Yusuke- Anyone up for beach ball?  
  
All-*run up to the net, dividing into teams*  
  
Yusuke-*spikes the ball, hitting Kurama in the face, causing everyone to laugh*  
  
Kim and Kanna-*Sneak up on Starr and pull the string on her bikini, causing it to fall down*  
  
Yusuke-Starr look!!  
  
Starr-*looks down to see her top is down, and pulls it up quickly*  
  
Hiei-There aren't enough days in the week for the therapy I'm gonna need!!!  
  
Starr-If you don't shut up right now I am going to hurt you so badly....  
  
Hiei-It doesn't take that to shut me up....but I get the picture.  
  
Yusuke-We'd better go before Starr gets in any more situations. See ya next week with more of our beach antics!!  
  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 


	4. Neglected Hosts and New Co-Hosts^_^;

Disclaimer: I do not, under any circumstance, own Yuyu Hakusho. Unfortunately.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Author's Note: Hey, I goofed last time. I put the first again, instead of the second, sorry guys! I sent the gang to the beach again, what with all the funny opportunities.(Diabolical laughing on cue now) MWAHAHAHAHA!!!{cough} NEW CO-HOST!!! And also, remember that I will interview OC's and authors. Just tell me what fic they appear in, and I'll get readin', cuz I'm runnin' outta guests and FAST! And there might not be episodes as often because I'm back in school....  
  
THE DEMENTED YUYU HAKUSHO TALK SHOW!!!  
  
Hosted By: Yusuke Urameshi!  
  
With: Star Minamino, Kim Michaels, Kanna Konimoto, Hiei, Keiko Yukimura, Botan, Kurama, and Kaite!  
  
Special Guests: Sarah becomes a new co-host!! Appearances by the Yu-Gi-Oh Gang, The Blitz Team, plus: Van, Fiona, and Irvine from Chaotic Century, and some cameos! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Yusuke-*walks out and sits on the sand* Hey guys! Welcome to the fourth episode of The Demented Yuyu Hakusho Talk Show! I'll call everyone out, so you'll get familiar with him or her. First out, Kaite!! (And If anyone asks this is a continuation of the antics in the third episode.)  
  
Kaite-*comes bounding out in a pair of swim trunks and a t-shirt, high- fiving Yusuke as he runs to a towel* Hey!  
  
Yusuke- Kurama!  
  
Kurama-*walks out and sits down, greeting Kaite as he sits*  
  
Yusuke: Kanna Konimoto!  
  
Kanna-*comes out in an orange two-piece sport swimsuit and orange sandals, doing cartwheels and back flips....again*  
  
Yusuke- Kim Michaels! (Do I really wanna ask?)  
  
Kim-*runs out in a black bikini with a gold chain around the waist, black sandals and sunglasses *  
  
Yusuke-Hiei!  
  
Hiei-*simply walks out, greeting no one, and sits down*  
  
Yusuke- Starr Minamino!!! (Still sporting that LOVELY little white getup)  
  
Starr-*Walks out in a white string bikini, a white headband, white sandals, and sunglasses. There is a silver locket around her neck (AN: Hint Hint!! Are you brain dead? Think of who she's in absolute LOVE with!)* What?  
  
Yusuke- Keiko Yukimura! (Can we get her off the show?)  
  
Keiko-*walks out in a blue one piece and sits down*  
  
Yusuke-Yuki Miyazaki!!  
  
Yuki-*runs out wearing a blood red tankini and red sandals, high fiving Yusuke and Kaite as she goes by*  
  
Yusuke- And Botan!!  
  
Botan-*bounds in wearing a green two-piece sport swimsuit and sandals* Hi guys!  
  
~*No sound from the audience..there isn't one.*~  
  
Botan-Kaite, I thought you left!  
  
Kaite-I did.I went two blocks down to buy sunscreen.  
  
Hiei and Starr-Moron.  
  
Yusuke-This is our fourth episode, and we're still at the beach! We have a new Co-Host, returning guests, and a few new ones as well!  
  
Starr-The Yu-Gi-Oh people are back!  
  
Kaite-She's happy because Seto Kaiba's coming back!  
  
Yusuke-And Joey....  
  
Kim-And Yami....  
  
Starr-Shut up idiots....Is it true we have the Blitz Team back too?  
  
Yusuke-Uh....yeah....  
  
Starr and Yuki- YES!!!  
  
Yusuke-They're happy little fangirls, aren't they?  
  
Yuki-Watch it Yusuke....don't play with fire or you WILL get burned!!!!!!!!!  
  
Starr-I don't care what he says....actually I have a better idea of how to get back at him.  
  
Kim-Oh no....  
  
Kurama-Not those two....  
  
~*Starr snaps her fingers and Doma The Angel Of Silence and Celtic Guardian come out and haul off Yusuke.*~  
  
All but Starr-O.O  
  
Starr-*Laughing maniacally* Goodbye ningen!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Hiei-*looks at her, then grabs a towel. He then wets it in the ocean, brings it over, and drops it on her head* Hush, Starr....and bring him back....  
  
Starr-*removing the towel from her head* (In an innocent sounding voice) Oh, do I have to?  
  
Hiei-*wrings out the towel and pops her with it*Yes, you do.  
  
~*Starr snaps again and the two monsters haul Yusuke back out and set him on the sand*~  
  
Yusuke-You thoroughly enjoyed that, didn't you?  
  
Starr-While it lasted, yes.  
  
Yusuke-Anyway....here's our first guests....The Yu-Gi-Oh Gang!!  
  
~*The Yu-Gi-Oh Group comes out of the beach house nearby....Making Starr and Kanna drool because Seto, Yami, and Joey are shirtless*~  
  
Hiei-*whaps Starr in the back of the head* You alive, kitsune?  
  
Starr-Yes, Idiot Koorime, I'm alive....  
  
Kim-I already have a question lined up for Yugi.  
  
Yugi-Go ahead and ask, Kim!  
  
Kim-WHY ARE YOU SO FUCKING SHORT?!  
  
Yugi-O.O I'm not short! Everyone else is just abnormally tall!  
  
Kanna-Stop torturing the kid, Kim!!  
  
Yugi-*hugs Kanna* Thank you!!!!  
  
Kanna-Was I just....hugged, Kurama?  
  
Kurama-I think so....I'm still stunned at Kim's question though, so I might be hallucinating.  
  
Kuwabara-You're positive you aren't really a hobbit?  
  
Yugi-Yes....I'm positive....I didn't pass the auditions for The Fellowship Of The Ring!!!  
  
Yusuke-Uh huh....  
  
Kim-Why can't they just accept that I wanna know why he's so damn short!?  
  
Yami-You'd be surprised at what some of his excuses are....  
  
Starr-*gets closer to Yami....quite a bit closer....* Could you tell me some of them?  
  
Yami-Okay, there's the abnormally tall bit, and then there's the little act where he falsely admits he's a hobbit....  
  
Hiei-*glaring at Starr* That stupid kitsune....  
  
Joey-Hey, I think your girlfriend likes Yami....  
  
Hiei-Don't push it, Chihuahua!!  
  
Seto-Hey, they learned something from me!!!!  
  
Kaite-Oh, then we can use that?  
  
Seto-Why not?  
  
Kaite-Excellent! Hey Yuki!!! C'mere, Chihuahua!!!  
  
Yuki-*glares at her brother* I'm more of a coyote than a Chihuahua.  
  
Kaite- Uh huh....sure Yuki....like I said, a Chihuahua.  
  
Yuki-*shoots Kaite a genuine, bonified, learned-from-the-source Heero Yuy death glare*  
  
Kaite-*pulls out swords* What can YOU do?  
  
Yuki-*whistles and Heero Yuy comes up in his Gundam* This....  
  
Kaite-*whistles and Spike comes up in his Swordfish II, and Brad comes up in the Shadowfox*  
  
Starr-*falls over into Yami's lap*  
  
Yami-Are you alright?  
  
Starr-If you count being cousins with the Maniacal Twins as being okay, then I'm just perfect....otherwise, I don't know....  
  
Yami-I know what you mean.  
  
Keiko- Oh no....  
  
Botan-I can't believe those two....doesn't she realize that everyone she's fighting is cute as heck?  
  
Yusuke-*sweatdrops* I forgot you two were here, you haven't said anything!!!  
  
Keiko-You forgot I was here?! You stupid son of a gun!!!  
  
Botan-I'll second that!!!!  
  
Yusuke-Oh no....*runs for his dear life*  
  
Yami-*sweatdrops, then feels Starr's head hit his shoulder* Huh?  
  
Starr-I can't believe this....*realizes her head is on his shoulder* Oops, sorry Yami....*gets up and sits by Hiei, putting her head in his lap* Miss me?  
  
Hiei-No....  
  
Starr-*gives him the puppy eyes*  
  
Hiei-....Okay maybe a little....  
  
Starr-Don't make me do it again!  
  
Hiei-*sweatdrops* Why are kitsunes so convincing?  
  
Yusuke-*sitting back down with two slap marks on his face* Joey, has Tea ever smacked you?  
  
Joey-No.  
  
Yusuke-Lucky son of a....oh look, kitsunes and koorimes DO mix!!  
  
~*Screen flips to Hiei and Starr kissing*~  
  
Joey-Oh look, a Kodak moment!*tears streaming down his face*  
  
Bakura-*snaps a picture of the two demons kissing* For the blackmail folders!!!  
  
Starr-*stops kissing Hiei and starts chasing Bakura around, throwing random objects at him* BONEHEAD!!!!  
  
Bakura-AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH YUGI HELP!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Yugi-What do you think I'm gonna do, it's too funny to have her stop!!!  
  
~*Yuki and Kaite are in their kitsune and mononoke (AN:couldn't think of what to call a wolf spirit, if anyone knows tell me) forms, growling at each other. Spike, Heero, and Brad are out of their machines, placing bets*  
  
Heero-My money's on Yuki....she's tough, she beat me a couple of times....  
  
Spike-I'm gonna go with Kaite, he's got a lot of blades....  
  
Brad-I'm betting the fox, she's cute as hell.  
  
Yusuke-I'm gonna bring out Van, Irvine, and Fiona now, okay? (As if anyone's listening to me....)  
  
~*The three walk out and Joey takes one look at Fiona and drools*~  
  
Joey-*rushing towards Fiona* I'm gonna be straight and to the point....Will you go out with me?  
  
Van-HEY!!!!!!  
  
Joey-Hey, I beat ya to it!!!!!  
  
~* Joey and Van start wrestling on the ground*~  
  
Fiona-Oh no....  
  
Irvine-Here we go...I'm gonna leave before I get sick....  
  
Fiona-Bye, Irvine.*goes and sits down, striking up a conversation with Kanna*  
  
~* Faye runs outta nowhere and jumps on Kaite's back* KAITE!!!!!  
  
Kaite-Faye!! Hi!!!! Get off please....  
  
Faye-Awww!!!*continues to hug Kaite*  
  
Yuki-Oh no....we'll continue this later....*turns back into human form and dives into the water*  
  
Yami-Are your cousins always fighting, Starr?  
  
Starr-*stops chasing Bakura* Huh? Oh, well, some of the time.  
  
Bakura-*running as fast as he can in the opposite direction of Starr* Thanks, Yami!!!  
  
Starr-What? Oooohhh, you little....  
  
Yami-I may have been pharaoh, but I still got in trouble.  
  
Hiei-*grabs Starr by the waist* Why do you argue with people?  
  
Starr-It's just what I do.  
  
Bit-*pops up out of nowhere* Can we come in now?  
  
Yusuke-I guess so....THIS SHOW IS GOING HAYWIRE!!! I KNEW I SHOULD HAVE SCRIPTED THIS!!!!  
  
~*Bit, Lena, and Jamie all walk out, sitting by Yusuke*~  
  
Lena-Where are those new co-hosts?  
  
Yusuke-There's only gonna be one....her OC's can drop by anytime though....  
  
Jamie-I'd like to meet an OC....  
  
Bit-So who's the new co-host, Yusuke?  
  
Sarah-Me!!!!^_^  
  
All but Yusuke and Starr-Sarah?!  
  
Starr-Sarah!!!!!  
  
Yusuke-I didn't call you out yet, Sarah....  
  
Sarah-Oh, well.  
  
Hiei-Oh no, it's the damn blackmail woman.  
  
Yusuke-Yes....Thank you so much for telling Starr that little juicy tidbit....  
  
Hiei-YOU TOLD STARR?!  
  
Sarah-Heh....^_^*holds up her own little "Blackmail on Hiei" folder* I have a blackmail folder on you.  
  
Hiei-Damnit all....  
  
Starr-Hiei....I only got the blackmail for Yusuke....It doesn't matter to me what happened when you were-*is cut off by Hiei clamping his hands over her mouth*  
  
Hiei-Shut up, kitsune!  
  
Kuwabara-I think I remember what happened....  
  
~*Hiei shoots Kuwabara a death glare, causing him to tremble*~  
  
Kuwabara-Wait....no I don't....that was something else.  
  
Sarah-I know what it was!!  
  
Botan and Keiko-We know you do....  
  
Starr-Sarah, Your insanity hour is really funny....can you tell us the EXACT name, so that our reviewers can look it up?  
  
Sarah- The exact name is SARAH AKA CELEBI'S LATENIGHT INSANITY HOUR! , and all flames on it will be used to heat my forge....or at least they would if I HAD a forge....  
  
  
  
Kanna-Riiiiiight. Uh huh sure whatever.  
  
Yugi-Kanna, you are very unusual.  
  
Kanna-And you expected me to be NORMAL if I hung out with THIS crowd?  
  
Yugi-Good point.  
  
~*Everyone but Yugi shoots Kanna a death glare*~  
  
Yami-*snaps out of the glaring daze* Oh and Starr, I meant to ask you, are you enjoying those gifts?  
  
Starr-Oh yes, they've come in handy a few times.  
  
Yusuke-Starr, do you not have to go back to school?  
  
Starr-I do....hey, SO DO YOU!!!  
  
Yusuke-Oh yeah....should we sign off?  
  
Kurama-I suppose so....school awaits....  
  
Starr-DAMNIT!!!! WHY DOES SCHOOL HAVE TO START!?  
  
Yusuke-*pats Starr on the shoulder* the feeling's mutual, Starr. See ya next week!!  
  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 


	5. To Boldly Go Where No Human Has Gone Bef...

Disclaimer: I own nothing...GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULLS!!! OK, I'm only playin' I luv you guys! Thanks for reading and I hope you like my new one! It was written in February, so bear with me.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Author's Note: Hey, I goofed last time. I keep doing that! I sent the gang to Yuki and Kaite's house, what with all the funny opportunities. (The idea came from a sibling) Wait 'till you read this! And also, remember that I will interview OC's and authors. Just tell me what fic they appear in, and I'll get readin', cuz I'm runnin' outta guests and FAST! And there might not be episodes as often because I'm back in school....crap....and by now, finals are comin' up....I hope I don't fail!!!!  
  
THE DEMENTED YUYU HAKUSHO TALK SHOW!!!  
  
Hosted By: Yusuke Urameshi!  
  
With: Starr Minamino, Sarah, Kim Michaels, Kanna Konimoto, Hiei, Keiko Yukimura, Botan, Kurama, and Kaite!  
  
Special Guests: Inu Yasha, Irvine, and Seiseiji Shaolin from G Gundam! (Yes I realize his last name HAS to be wrong but it's ok, I'm only half-human)  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Yusuke-*walks out and sits on the front porch of Yuki and Kaite's house* Hey guys! Welcome to the new episode of The Demented Yuyu Hakusho Talk Show! I'll call everyone out, so you'll get familiar with him or her. The order has changed, just for today. And, Keiko's on vacation, so she won't be here. Also, we've locked Botan in the closet so she wouldn't have a fit when she saw these guys' house! First up today is Kanna Konimoto!  
  
Kanna-*walks out, wearing camouflage flares, a camouflage tank top with silver rhinestones spelling "ARMY Angel", a see through camouflage jacket that is knee length, and black boots (Not combat boots), and sits on the steps*  
  
Yusuke-Kurama!  
  
Kurama-*walks out in his normal apparel, sitting down next to Kanna and kissing her lightly on the cheek*  
  
Yusuke-Starr Minamino! What in the world?!  
  
Starr-*Walks out and sits down about a foot from Kurama, placing a notebook there. Her hair has been dyed brown with blonde streaks, and she's wearing a Tennessee Titans jersey (Jevon Kearse), with jean short shorts, and white sneakers, with that same silver locket around her neck. (If you haven't figured that out yet, email me at RikaTamer@aol.com)*  
  
Yusuke-Hiei!  
  
Hiei*Walks out quietly, in normal apparel (for him), and sits down beside Starr*  
  
Yusuke-Kim Michaels! (Oh.My.Lord.)  
  
Kim-*comes out dressed in a pair of low-rise sandblasted jeans and a pink bikini top, oversized silver hoop earrings, and stilettos. She has bangles around both wrists. Kim sits next to a plant as far away from Hiei as she can get.*  
  
Yusuke-And, the lovely and talented Sarah!  
  
Sarah-*comes out and sits next to Starr, moving the book. She's wearing black knee-highs, a black miniskirt, a white blouse, and a black and white striped headband*  
  
Starr-So, I suppose it would be best if we brought out the guests....Yusuke, can I?  
  
Yusuke-Don't see why not. Go ahead!  
  
Starr-Please give a warm welcome to Inu Yasha, Kagome, Irvine, and Seiseiji Shaolin! Get out here, you people!  
  
~*~The guests all come out, Irvine hugging Sarah and Starr, Seiseiji giving each girl a rose and a kiss on the cheek, Inu Yasha putting a cherry blossom in each girl's hair, and everyone shaking hands. They sit on the step below the hosts.~*~  
  
Yusuke-Um....flowers? Even Inu Yasha? What the hell?  
  
Irvine-We missed Valentine's Day.  
  
Sarah-I'm certainly not complaining!  
  
Hiei-*glares at Starr* I am. *Is Immediately elbowed in the side by Starr, giving him a death glare.*  
  
Inu Yasha-I think he's jealous, Starr!  
  
Sarah-Especially after what happened at our Christmas party.*pulls out a folder labeled "Blackmail On Starr Minamino" and waves it around in her face.*  
  
Starr-Go ahead. I've got nothing to hide.*smiles maliciously at Irvine, who knows the ENTIRE story.*  
  
Irvine- Sarah, are you pulling the mistletoe incident or the eggnog incident?  
  
Yusuke-There was an eggnog incident? Lemma SEE!*stands over the folder, waiting for her to take out a picture*  
  
Starr- Uh....there's proof of the eggnog incident?  
  
Yusuke- Oh god....Starr, why can't you wear shirts like that all the time? *Hands Hiei the picture*  
  
Hiei-*raises an eyebrow* Yusuke's right....  
  
Everyone except Hiei- SAY WHAT?!  
  
Hiei- Why DON'T you wear shirts like that all the time?  
  
Sarah-*Hits Hiei and Yusuke in the head* You perverts....  
  
Yusuke-*holding his head* You bitch....  
  
Sarah-Yep....Wait 'till you meet my yami!  
  
~*Yuki and Kaite walk out onto the porch, Kaite in his pajamas and Yuki in black bondage pants with many buckles and buttons, accompanied by a black T- Shirt proclaiming: I live in my own little world, but it's okay....they know me here!*~  
  
Yuki-Uh, guys....WHAT THE HELL?!  
  
Kaite-Seriously....it's like, 7:00 in the morning! No normal people are up!  
  
Yuki-*looks at him with a bemused look* I was up!  
  
Kaite-*rolls his eyes* I rest my case.  
  
Inu Yasha-*starts playing with one of Yuki's buckles* These are really loose pants....mind if I help you out of them?  
  
Yuki-*blinks, then gets an evil smile* Later....  
  
Yusuke- And you accuse ME of being perverted!  
  
Seiseiji-*nudges Starr and giggles* I think he's just jealous that nobody's hitting on HIM!  
  
Starr:*laughing hysterically* Oh, that's cold! As good as it is, that's cold!  
  
Kaite: Back to the task at hand here.why are you here?  
  
Sarah: We came to use your karaoke machine.  
  
Kim: Ours is broken.  
  
Yuki: Oh, Kim....did you try to sing again?  
  
Kanna: That was mean....funny, but mean.  
  
Kim: NO! I threw it at Kuwabara.  
  
Yusuke: Yeah, that was funny! He's still out, I think..  
  
Sarah: No, I just locked him in the closet before we left.  
  
Yuki: Ooh....why didn't I think of that?  
  
Irvine: You weren't there?  
  
Yuki: That's probably it. Well, come in, I guess.  
  
~*The whole group walks into Yuki and Kaite's house. Starr grabs onto Hiei's sleeve to keep herself from collapsing at the sight of all the weaponry. *~  
  
Starr: What's all this?  
  
Yuki and Kaite: Our stuff. *Looking at her like she's mental*  
  
Seiseiji:*picking up a pair of Uzi's* Nice....  
  
Yuki: *Taking them from him* Mine....  
  
Kanna: Where's the Karaoke Machine?  
  
Kaite: Through here.*Points at the hallway.*  
  
Inu Yasha: What's in here?*Gesturing at a door*  
  
Yuki: Kaite's room.*Opens the door*  
  
~*When Yuki opens the door, quite a few jaws drop. Stacked up on the walls are swords, daggers, and even a few pikes. Starr falls backwards into Yusuke*~  
  
Yuki: Yeah....pretty lame....and he hardly ever keeps it clean.  
  
Seiseiji : Let's see YOUR room, Yuki.  
  
Hiei: I'm actually scared to see hers.  
  
Kim: Why?  
  
Hiei: Because I'm wondering if Kaite's room is any indication of what hers looks like.  
  
Kaite and Yuki: Not remotely.  
  
Inu Yasha: Then let's see it.  
  
~*Yuki walks down the hall a bit, and then opens a door. Irvine peeks inside, and then looks at Yuki oddly, who shrugs.*~  
  
Yuki: I told you, no indication. It's actually CLEAN.  
  
Kaite: This coming from the "almighty narcoleptic warrior"....you sleep until three in the damned afternoon, and then there's nothing left TO do but clean your room, Yuki!!! I'm going to bed....somewhere quiet. Good-BYE!  
  
Yusuke and Yuki: His point?  
  
~* Everybody looks into the room. It's done in an oriental style, with a very neat layout. There were three light switches on the wall next to the doorframe*~  
  
Seiseiji: It's....not exactly what you'd expect from an undead assassin, Yuki....  
  
Yuki: I'M NOT UNDEAD, I'M A DEMON!!!!!!!!  
  
Kim: What's the third switch for?  
  
Irvine: You really wanna know? Flip it.  
  
~*Yuki and Irvine smile at each other as Kim flips the switch. Panels stick out from the walls as a plethora of different guns is shown. Yusuke faints at the sight of all the firearms and ammunition.*~  
  
Yuki: Well, it's Kim's fault, be sure to tell dimwit when he wakes up. That's all for now....don't miss the next episode of The Demented Yuyu Hakusho Talk Show!*Kicks everyone but Inu Yasha out of her room, flips the switch back, closes the door, and locks it.*  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 


End file.
